chaotic order

This essay, in many ways is a confession. Perhaps Nostalgia is a better word. And it came upon me last Sunday, as I tuned into Netflix to watch an old Sophia Loren and Cary Grant movie “Houseboat”. It is a film that touches a very deep, sensitive chord within me for a reason very different from what I am used too. It evokes memories of my first, and probably the only episode of puerile infatuation with a girl in my life. It’s a strange feeling; and it has lingered on like a shadow after nearly twenty five years now. A thousand more beautiful, captivating and interesting faces and minds have passed before my eyes, but her’s still remains resplendent in my mind. When I close my eyes, I vividly see her fair skin, dove like eyes, clad in a spotless cream Salwar, walking, smiling, and talking with lissome feminine grace that marks the fresh touch of maturity. It all happened at an age when distinct stirrings of one’s manhood uncoils itself, and the body is infused with an uncomfortable ye

Anthony De Mello SJ and the order of St Ignatius - a personal gratitude and remembrance. A casual look at the 16th century portrait of Saint Ignatius of Loyola by the great sensualist, Flemish painter, master of color and depth - Peter Paul Ruben - will reveal a Man with regal bearing, an aristocratic face, steady gaze, slightly tilted upward in a divine trance, draped in crimson tunic, one hand holding a prayer book (possibly) and the other turned outward in benediction and renounced abandon; gently leaning against a table with effortless ease. One would scarcely believe that this is a picture of a man who founded one of the most influential, prolific, authentic and mystical Christian societies in the history of organized Christian church. “The society of Jesus” or the Jesuits, as it is known throughout the globe was established by Ignatius, the chivalrous soldier, in 1521, after his forced convalescence due to injuries sustained in a war against the French. The hot spirited warri

The story of English Dictionary. On my flight back last Saturday, after a cozy lunch served in the first class cabin, I settled down to read for God-knows how many’eth time the wonderful play of Shakespeare - “the Twelfth night”. I have a quite a strange affinity for Shakespearean drama. From my school days - when the very name of Shakespeare evoked immense disgust (because of its convoluted language, obscured imagery and bygone contexts) and the need to memorize huge tracts of painful orations - to the present time, when I almost love every written word ever penned by this great bard - the journey had been enriching and fruitful (to say the least), and like vatted wines, his dramas and sonnets have aged imperceptibly within me invoking a delectable taste in my literary buds, improving its sublimity and taste with each fresh reading and contemplation. Shakespeare wrote most of his plays and sonnets between the years 1590 and 1613 - the most prolific, productive and to a large ext

Rajni - a Janus-faced life It is not surprising to find a Hollywood actor professing or proselytizing a religious faith or spiritual practice. Tom cruise is known for his commitment to Scientology; Richard Gere, a catholic by birth, a Buddhist by choice has been active in the Tibetan freedom movement for a long time; Madonna, the pin-up girl of the eighties and nineties has switched allegiances multiple times from being a Jew, to a practicing Cabbalist, and then to Islam; Rain Wilson, a rising comedian indulges in Bahai - a Persian faith; Steven Seagal , the uncrowned king of martial art movies believes himself to be a reincarnation of the Dalai Lama; Robert Downey Jr, interestingly confesses that he is a “JeBu” – a Jewish Buddhist; or Russell Brand, the British actor, who chose to marry his girlfriend Indian style, is a committed practitioner of Kundalini Yoga( Incidentally, his Indian guru is now a very rich man!!) - The list seems to be endless, and this fashion statement to be

“Bala, each day I am becoming more and more insecure with my job. It is kind of odd because when I entered software industry fifteen years ago, I had very little knowledge but abundant energy, but now it seems as though the tables are reversed. I am becoming more self-conscious of my role, and every new task assigned seems an overwhelming burden. I am not able to plunge into a task with that gay abandon that I used to before. Something pulls me back, and saps all my energy…” I was talking to an old friend of mine a couple of months ago. He had called me from India, and after exchanging pleasantries, he broke into this monologue recounted above. I know he is doing well for himself - career wise. He joined a small company as a developer many years ago, and very quickly rose up the ranks to become a tech lead and subsequently a Project manager. About five years ago, he got married and now lives in a posh three bedroom apartment in Bangalore. Recently, he did achieve the distinction of

Junot Diaz’s “The Brief wondrous life of Oscar Wao” - A literary work of fiction What most of us often get to read in history books is this : ‘Christopher Columbus discovered Americas in 1492’; and after that, in a short few paragraphs, pages or chapters (depending upon who is writing the book), the focus shifts to formation of the Union centuries later, its civil war and all the rest of it. What is largely left out of these narratives is the wonderful account of Santa Domingo, the oldest European city in Americas and the first Spanish establishment in the new world; and the first stop of Columbus on his fourth voyage sponsored by the Catholic royalty of Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain. The city was christened after its patron Saint Dominic. Rich in gold and fertile with abundant alluvial plains, it was a milking cow for the ailing Christian monarchy; and within half a century, the unbridled avarice and voracious appetite for much needed gold to replenish the impoverished royal cof

" Of late, I find no energy, intensity in daily life. You know, I am comfortably placed. Happy family, Decent house, respectable job ; but somehow, I don't find the energy to do the things I want to do. For example, I have been holding on to a book for the last three weeks, reading a few pages each day and then I begin to procrastinate. Similarly with Music, Drama, sports and all my creative interests - I know I got to be doing these things, but somehow focus eludes me. A lot of unfinished projects in my life , Bala..." We are sitting in coffee shop after our swim. Both of us are almost of the same age. He works in a senior management position in a bank, keeps shuttling between the West and east coats for work. A Well read person, and a very good conversationalist - I enjoy being in his company whenever I can. I replied.. " Yes, Drake (name changed). You are right. What you say is true of many of us. It is interesting though, that in my case, things changed aft